I cried every day from July until the end of October. Every single day. I still shed a tear or two most days. I've been working at Wal-Mart in Durant since mid September as a distraction and so I can pay my health insurance. God knows Brian won't and could never afford to do it. For the most part I am happier being around other people. I've been to several job interviews and I haven't gotten the jobs... I've realize I'm probably never going to be able to work for DHS. My heart still hurts. Brian's still an asshole. I hate living here in this house with him. I wish I could move out but I have no family and no money.
The hardest part for me is moving on. Getting past everything that happened to me in the last year. I don't care anything about Brian. I have no feelings for him at all. I've been completely hurt by someone else and He will never apologize to me. I have to learn to move on and be okay with myself. Time and distance are the only things that can heal these wounds. Time and distance. I will be okay eventually. Until then I will wait patiently for this ache to fade.
Life lesson #4308543089
Guard your heart.
